In the 30 Rock episode I just watched there was a joke mocking how much I + the members of my generation talk about ourselves. I thought I would combat this by talking about myself. HILARIOUS. The total self-indulgent sharing / promotion / aggrandizing done by 20-somethings on the internet is not a new joke. But listen dudes. In order to keep your shit out there you have to be available on a million platforms, and each one asks you to talk about yourself. It’s ridiculous how many profiles I’ve written and  many profile pics I’ve chosen.

It’s a Small World After All (THE REMIXXX.)

Hoooooooooey! Huge shout-out to my sweet lil’ so-n-so roomie Natasha for this amazing sociobyte.

I have spent some time in NYC over the past few years, and have made the acquaintance of one John Wellington Simon. John is way into being a >promoter/performer/dandy/man-about-town< (yah, holla @ mad clubbin if a gal’s wearing high-heels). To that end, he uses facebook and twitter in a very purposeful way – to get people where he’s at.

So peep these mad tecky social connections:

Step #1: I post pics of John and myself on facebook a few weeks ago, Natasha sees them.

Step #2: I follow both John (DandyWellington) and Natasha (twitter name withheld) on twitter and they both follow me (umwhatnelle).

Step #3: When I respond to John via tweet, Natasha connects DandyWellington to the John Wellington Simon who is my legit real-life friend.

Fast forward to the present. Last week (well, almost the present), Natasha is on and WHAT DOES SHE SEE but a reference to John Wellington’s twitter. He is apparently DJing the always top-secretly-located Vogue holiday party. . . and tweeting about where it is. . . Gawker is like “Omigod, look at this dude leaking the secret LOL!” (Okay, maybe they were a bit more well-spoken, but emphasis on a bit.) Party fail, but social networking SUCCESS. And it gets better. Natasha texts me, I text John, John gets on his Blackberry and heads over to, then posts the article to facebook. In the meantime, Gawker has done more research on John, finds his blog, finds the music video of his friend’s single he twittered about “dropping” at the Vogue party. And sure, they are knocking him for being loose-lipped and sinking the Vogue-exclusivity ship, but any publicity is good publicity when you’re in entertainer– especially in this case, when he’s tied to such a rad event.

So Natasha, who has never met John, and lives a thousand+ miles away from NYC, is the one who sounded the original bell alerting Mr. Wellington Simon to his gossip blog fame. Hilarious and FASCINATING. Mostly hilarious.

u active?? check this proactive interactive biz.

I have become a running fiend over the past four months and prefer bookin’ it outdoors, but as Iowa temps dropped from balmy autumn 40º  to inhumane subzero, my regular route to the Mercer Park rec center often proved too excruciating, despite layers of old XL t-shirts, sweats, and a windbreaker. So, as the gift-holiday rolled around, I sent my sweet mom an xmas list topped with a request for some outdoor-Midwestern-winter-exercise duds. Being the HIGH QUALITY LOVIN’ WOMAN she is, mama headed over to, where she reported back on some very cool interactive-social-techy business.

As my mom waffled between polar-tech and fleece, hopping from page to page, clicking a radio button and then changing her mind, a chat window popped up.

Can I help you find something?

And it was a real dude! Not an automated computer system, ready to send her to some pointless search window, but an actual person at a keyboard, ready to help.

Now I have used a help-by-chat option on sites before – that service at HostMonster’s cpanel is always my go-to when I’m lost – but a proactive interactive online salesperson? Replicating the irritating in-store commissioned employee CYBER-LY? Cool. I am not sure if the chat was a response to my mom’s fruitless searching, or the length of time she spent on the site without purchasing, or if it is something that happens to even the most direct-linking customer, but how neat is this? And how totally helpful! If there was something missing in the online shopping experience before, it was that you were on your own. My mom described what she was looking for to the helper and he pointed her in the right direction.

Another perk? If you do not want help it’s way easier to ignore a chat window than something with bones and a smile. Job well done, Patagonia. WAY 2 B FASCINATING.

ZOMG our world is so rad.

Emergency post! Amazing & fascinating NEW LEAP has been taken . . .  something I’ve never seen before . . .  something I would never have believed to be true . . .

I think my sweet roommate Emily just got invited to a wedding by being tagged in a fb photo. Peep the pic below.

You guys! This is intense! Intensely great! I got fb-invited-ONLY to two weddings this summer. Both were pretty casual – one for a gay couple (yay iowa) that was pretty much like an amazing cabaret show, one for a couple in the art department that offered make-yr-own pizza. But don’t get me wrong, they were real weddings, with vows and an officiator and cake. And they facebook invited ppl. How rad is that?

This, though, rubs me a little bit the wrong way. I feel like the fb event is sort of weird and hilarious (best compliments evvver, in my book) and tongue-in-cheek. This seems more like . . . lazy. Maybe I’m just being a design snob about the invite, idk.

TIMESPACECONTINUUM is totally fuckkesdz

I finally have enough subdomains/tagged photos/accredited blog comments that the results of my high school track meet and my participation in the 2003 Iowa City Public Library spelling bee have moved from the first page of my google search. THANK GOD. I am not into everyone knowing I was #104, with a time of 10.67. Not like I even know what the hell that means anymore. I feel like it was sprinting and those were seconds. And I was pretty much last place…

Abandoned things stick around online in a way they don’t in the real world, because of the whole infinite v. finite space thing. This is QUITE APPEALING to me aka pack-rat dunlap (The numbr one lesson I learned this fall was Never Get Rid Of Any Clothing Item, Ever.)

Even though I said a paragraph ago that I was “not into” everyone knowing about the sprinting business, truth is I AM. Because me as a horrible 17-yr-old sprinter is just as important as me now. Like, why was I doing that when I was SO BAD at it? Because I failed gym the first two trimesters of my senior year because of class-skipping, and had to join the track team (and take exercise classes at community college) in order to graduate. HOW HILARIOUS IS THAT!? I don’t feel like that fact and accompanying story is deserving of the first page of my google search, but I’m glad it’s still up there. Awwwww!!

the hills are alive with the sounds of technology-y-y

In August I got to spend about two weeks in the same itty-bitty northern Wisconsin cabin I have been spending holidays at since I was but a babe. (A baby, that is. I’m still tots a babe WHAAAAT.)

special note! I realize so many of these posts are starting with: Once upon a time, I had this experience blah blah! But I have been jotting down down social tech ideas for months, and have been thinking about them even longer, so there’s a lot to catch up on. STOP GIVING ME A HARD TIME. Just kidding, no one is giving me a hard time. Ever. About anything.

As I was saying, I was at this pine-tree-encrusted paradise of toads and canoes with my sweet mom, my SHOCKINGLYGREAT sister, and my INSPIRATIONALLY-SOCIALLY-TECHNOLOGICAL cousin.

So this is a lot of preamble to say that the most hilarious thing ever happened in the kitchen. There’s nothing even resembling the internet up there, but as I walked by the oven installed by my great-grandfather Forrest Bennet I SWORE TO GOD I heard the little chime of a new gchat. Ears muthrfkn perked up. Who’s talking to me?

It was a teapot knocking against the burner or something, but isn’t it SO FASCINATING how we are now so attuned to a set of sounds that didn’t even exist before? Certainly this is not a new phenomenon– the sound of a locomotive was a wholly new sound that became ingrained or whatevs, as was the ringing of the telephone– but the sounds we now associate with getting some kind of new information are so subtle. It’s not like “OH DAMN, THAT’S A TRAIN,” but instead like “Oh, that soft series of tones is a new email on my iPhone,” and “Oh, that background whirring on the song I made in GarageBand is my overworked harddrive,” and “Oh, that tiny click at the beginning of my PhotoBooth dance video is me hitting the space bar to start All The Single Ladies in iTunes.” (Wow, Apple should pay me a zillion$$ for that sentence. Barf, sorry.)

Wisconsin raspberry picking / blackberry using